Repair and strengthen your connection.

Couples therapy

in California and New York

You and your partner are stuck in exhausting cycles.

Maybe there was a significant event that rocked the boat. Or perhaps you and your partner have been stuck in repeating cycles of conflict, miscommunication, and emotional distress. Things feel tense and you try so hard to make shifts, but every conversation and argument ends up in the same place.

It could feel like you and your partner are no longer on the same side, and you’re not sure how you got here. Intimacy, friendship, and spark and minimal, if not gone, but all you want is to reconnect and create a smoother relationship. 

Sound like you?

Feeling not seen or heard by your partner

Constant arguing and tension

Wishing you could find a way feel connected

Feeling unsupported and that your needs are not met

Betrayal or broken trust

Couples therapy offers a new space,

to better understand both yourself and your partner, the patterns that contribute to stress and tension, and to build relationship skills to hear, see, and relate to one another in a different and compassionate way.

what we’ll work on

Addressing relationship issues in couples therapy

Couples therapy with me

We will develop a plan that includes:
- identifying your own emotional triggers, reactions, and communication
- better understanding your partner’s triggers, reactions, and communication
- learning how to “fight” better and use tools such as space, conscious check-ins, regulating, attentive listening, and compassion in moments of tension and conflict
- review values and where they seem aligned and misaligned
- explore how cultural differences play a role in the relationship
- discussions around issues, life transitions or topics that are typically avoided
- ways to strengthen your compassion, friendship and intimacy towards one another

Imagine a life where…

  • You and your partner lead by compassion, curiosity and love.

  • You have a deeper understanding of both you and your partner’s triggers.

  • Conflict can end in calm resolution.

  • Trust, intimacy and friendship are re-built.

  • You and your partner are co-creating a life of shared values and meaning.

  • You and your partner can communicate, listen, and support one another more effectively.

the frameworks that guide our work

Gottman Method

Developed by Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman, this framework focuses on enhancing couples' communication, understanding, and intimacy by teaching practical skills for managing conflict, building trust, and strengthening the emotional bond between partners. The method involves assessment tools, interventions, and strategies derived from extensive research to help couples develop healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

In couples therapy, EFT centers on understanding and reshaping emotional interactions between partners, to create more secure bonds. Couples learn to recognize and express their underlying emotions and attachment needs, while recognizing emotional patterns of their partner. Through guided conversations, couples learn to identify negative patterns of interaction and develop healthier ways of connecting, fostering greater intimacy and relationship satisfaction.

Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT)

When applied to couples therapy, CFT integrates principles of compassion and empathy to enhance relationship dynamics. It helps couples recognize and address self-criticism and relational distress by promoting understanding, acceptance, and emotional support. Through cultivating compassion for oneself and one's partner, couples can develop a more caring and resilient bond while navigating challenges and conflicts in a constructive way.

It is possible for relationships to evolve.

FAQ

  • Session fees are $285 for 60-minute sessions. I encourage folks to consider the “cost” as an investment to the health and longevity of their relationship. Sliding scale is offered for those who are in financial hardship.

  • While INN with United and Oxford plans, I generally do not take insurance for couples therapy, unless the couples sessions are focused on an individual’s mental health diagnosis. These sessions would involve psychoeducation for the partner, as well as discussions on how to best support the individual’s treatment plan, and would require 6-8 individual sessions first. Couples therapy that focuses on relationship issues, such as communication and conflict, are not typically centered on an individual’s diagnosis (even if the individual has one) but on relationship dynamics, therefore a billable insurance code is not used.

  • Couples therapy is the perfect starting point for addressing the layers of conflict, tension, and emotional distress happening in your relationship. While our in-session discussions are to gain deeper insight, introduce new skills, and create a new space for you both, the work done outside of session is just as important. I’ll be giving exercises and prompts (both individual and to do together) for you to deepen this work and extend it to your daily life.

  • Success in couples therapy is closely linked with both persons having a “buy in” to wanting to do couples therapy. While your partner may not be convinced, they will receive more information on the joint free phone consultation, and are welcome to schedule an additional 1:1 consultation where I can answer and address any questions or confusion they have on couples therapy, and provide clarity on what they can expect if they choose to try it out.